A 10-minute read from the people at PurposeBuilt.
Happy Mother’s Day.
This week’s note offers a meaningful moment to explore the role of the feminine in our lives.
I’m mindful that this day can bring up a lot—gratitude, grief, tenderness, and complexity.
Wherever you find yourself, I hope you hold yourself with care through the process.
Let’s start with an irony.
Mothering is often framed as an act of giving.
And yet, at its healthiest, mothering—like any relationship—is a flow between giving and receiving.
That’s where many of us still have room to grow.
Because while we may have learned how to give to others, few of us were taught how to recognize what we need—or how to allow that care in return.
:: Your 10 Minutes Starts Now ::
(This one’s a bit longer—grab a snack. It’s worth it.)
Part 1: Why Is Receiving Important for Capacity?
“Receiving” can feel like an odd word.
For our purposes, it simply means allowing yourself to have your needs and wants met.
Not always—but also not never. 😉
It’s letting encouragement, rest, appreciation, or connection be okay to ask for—and safe to accept when it arrives.
This matters because when we don’t know how to receive, we unconsciously cap what’s available to us.
In business terms, we create an upper limit on our own capacity.
We get stuck in the equation of effort equals worth, leaving no room for ourselves inside the system we’re building.
We miss that most forms of support don’t require us to earn them.
Receiving expands our internal container.
It teaches the nervous system that it’s safe to have needs—and to let them be met.
Part 2: A Personal Story
Two weeks ago, I stood on stage at the Small Giants Summit and gave the most personal talk I’ve ever delivered to a business audience.
I shared new stories—drawing from ancient lineages—about inner leadership and what it means to return home to ourselves in a world that constantly pulls us outward.
And I’ll be honest: it pushed my edges.
Not because it was hard to speak—but because I deeply wanted to be received.
This was a room of 160 leaders I admired—founders, CEOs, community builders.
I wanted to belong. I wanted to be let in.
That’s what made it vulnerable.
Letting myself want that.
I didn’t just deliver a talk.
I allowed the impact to matter.
And in doing so, I remembered something essential:
The capacity to receive—to be impacted, affirmed, and cared for—is not separate from leadership.
It’s what allows us to lead from wholeness and humanity.
Without it, we cut ourselves off from the very thing we’re trying to build.
If you’d like to explore this work more deeply, you can get in touch here.
Part 3: Receiving as Feminine Energy
The ability to recognize our wants and needs is often associated with feminine energy—an energetic posture of openness, trust, and attunement.
Many of us have complicated relationships with this.
Some grew up with over-nurturing—always being managed or smothered.
Others experienced under-nurturing—little warmth, affection, or safety.
Still others lived in emotional volatility—chaos, rage, unpredictability.
In all these cases, the feminine may have felt unsafe or unreliable.
So we leaned toward structure, logic, performance, and control.
But healthy feminine energy isn’t collapse or chaos.
It’s strong, connected, and deeply attuned care.
It’s the knowing: I can hold this—without carrying it alone.
Part 4: Learning to Name What You Feel
The first step in receiving is recognizing what you feel.
That’s not always obvious.
Many of us were praised for being “easy,” “low-maintenance,” or “not too sensitive.”
Often, that came at the cost of emotional fluency.
Years ago, I realized I didn’t truly know how to track my emotions.
So I began mapping.
For over a year, I paid attention—tracking where feelings lived in my body and what stories accompanied them.
One moment stands out.
In Hawaii in 2019, lying in the grass, looking up at golden light moving through clouds, I felt something unfamiliar.
Nothing to protect. Nothing to manage.
Just peace.
That’s what gratitude felt like.
Now, when I want to reconnect to that feeling, I return to that image.
This is how emotional fluency is built: noticing, naming, and remembering.
Part 5: Start with the Emotion Wheel
The Emotion Wheel is one of my favorite tools for learning to identify feeling states.
It helps move from vague—I feel off—to specific: lonely, tender, insecure, disappointed.
A book I often recommend alongside this work is How Emotions Are Made by Dr. Lisa Feldman Barrett.
“An emotion is your brain’s creation of what your bodily sensations mean… It is a prediction that guides your actions and helps you meet your body’s needs.”
—Dr. Lisa Feldman Barrett
Once you can name what you’re feeling, you can explore the story attached—and what it reveals about your needs.
Receiving isn’t conceptual.
It’s felt.
The warmth of being understood.
The exhale of being met without shame.
Part 6: Practice — Reflective Receiving
Receiving is a practice.
It requires a soft focus and a willingness not to fill space just because you can.
A shift from reaching forward to leaning back.
From doing to allowing.
Somatic Practice: Lean Back (5 minutes)
Sit or lie down with your back supported.
One hand on your heart. One on your belly.
Breathe into the back body.
Let your system register the support already beneath you.
Then ask:
How open am I to receiving support right now?
If it were here, could I let it in?
Reflection Prompts
What story did I inherit about receiving help?
Is it still true?
What would it feel like to receive without guilt?
Let whatever arises be enough.
Part 7: Still With Me?
If you made it this far—thank you.
If something stirred, I’d love to hear about it. Just hit reply.
Next up, we’ll explore how to hold what you’ve let in—and allow it to fuel expansion.